Comments on: Coitus fencerruptus http://rurritable.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/coitus-fencerruptus/ Another wimpy cat-blogger Mon, 16 Nov 2009 00:33:14 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: coozledad http://rurritable.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/coitus-fencerruptus/#comment-380 coozledad Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:51:24 +0000 http://rurritable.wordpress.com/?p=635#comment-380 Yeah. Fortunately for humans the technique isn't nearly so barbarous.I remember watching my uncle castrate a bull in a decrepit wooden headstall once. The anesthetic of choice was a can of Lysol, sprayed at close range to freeze the superficial nerves on the scrotum (side benefits include antiseptic properties and an herbal fresh scent). My uncle and his assistant just managed to sever the testicles before the bull shattered his wooden confines to splinters and ran off looking for something to kill. There are better ways. Yeah. Fortunately for humans the technique isn’t nearly so barbarous.I remember watching my uncle castrate a bull in a decrepit wooden headstall once. The anesthetic of choice was a can of Lysol, sprayed at close range to freeze the superficial nerves on the scrotum (side benefits include antiseptic properties and an herbal fresh scent).
My uncle and his assistant just managed to sever the testicles before the bull shattered his wooden confines to splinters and ran off looking for something to kill.
There are better ways.

]]> By: The Subtle Rudder http://rurritable.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/coitus-fencerruptus/#comment-379 The Subtle Rudder Fri, 21 Nov 2008 15:31:48 +0000 http://rurritable.wordpress.com/?p=635#comment-379 "...a large compound plier called an emasculatome." My boyfriend just shivered via IM. “…a large compound plier called an emasculatome.”

My boyfriend just shivered via IM.

]]> By: coozledad http://rurritable.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/coitus-fencerruptus/#comment-373 coozledad Thu, 20 Nov 2008 21:55:43 +0000 http://rurritable.wordpress.com/?p=635#comment-373 Moe: Apparently they make a banding tool large enough to castrate a full grown bull. We also own a large compound plier called an emasculatome. We've never used it, but I've seen a vet use one during a surgical castration to crush the vascular branches along the epididemis. As James Brown famously said, I broke out in a cold sweat. I always tell me wife she just bought it as a backup, in case I sprout a replacement pair. It looks like something developed for the goddamned inquisition. I imagine there are many veterinary tools that have esoteric secondary uses. Moe: Apparently they make a banding tool large enough to castrate a full grown bull. We also own a large compound plier called an emasculatome. We’ve never used it, but I’ve seen a vet use one during a surgical castration to crush the vascular branches along the epididemis.
As James Brown famously said, I broke out in a cold sweat.
I always tell me wife she just bought it as a backup, in case I sprout a replacement pair. It looks like something developed for the goddamned inquisition.
I imagine there are many veterinary tools that have esoteric secondary uses.

]]> By: moe99 http://rurritable.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/coitus-fencerruptus/#comment-372 moe99 Thu, 20 Nov 2008 20:23:41 +0000 http://rurritable.wordpress.com/?p=635#comment-372 don't emergency wards in San Francisco see patients with the kind of problems you're talking about here? Only they're self induced? don’t emergency wards in San Francisco see patients with the kind of problems you’re talking about here? Only they’re self induced?

]]> By: coozledad http://rurritable.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/coitus-fencerruptus/#comment-371 coozledad Thu, 20 Nov 2008 17:21:04 +0000 http://rurritable.wordpress.com/?p=635#comment-371 My wife and I both eat at our computers, and talk back and forth about what we're reading. Unfortunately, we also drink at our computers, and I've drowned at least one keyboard. The one I've got now seems to have been engineered to anticipate my "spells", and I haven't shorted it out yet; but it's unsightly. I need to run a toothbrush between the keys to dislodge some of the larger gobbets of old refritos, potato chips, and half-chewed Tings. I could probably grow corn on it. My wife and I both eat at our computers, and talk back and forth about what we’re reading. Unfortunately, we also drink at our computers, and I’ve drowned at least one keyboard. The one I’ve got now seems to have been engineered to anticipate my “spells”, and I haven’t shorted it out yet; but it’s unsightly. I need to run a toothbrush between the keys to dislodge some of the larger gobbets of old refritos, potato chips, and half-chewed Tings. I could probably grow corn on it.

]]> By: The Subtle Rudder http://rurritable.wordpress.com/2008/11/20/coitus-fencerruptus/#comment-370 The Subtle Rudder Thu, 20 Nov 2008 15:59:01 +0000 http://rurritable.wordpress.com/?p=635#comment-370 This made me snort-laugh tea all over my keyboard. Thank god I'd already killed my fancy silver one with an unfortunate dollop of hummus. The old white one's got so many stains and crumbs, I expect accidental liquids only make it stronger. Your unfortunate fraternity made my morning! This made me snort-laugh tea all over my keyboard. Thank god I’d already killed my fancy silver one with an unfortunate dollop of hummus. The old white one’s got so many stains and crumbs, I expect accidental liquids only make it stronger. Your unfortunate fraternity made my morning!

]]>