Me and my wife helped to get a couple of food trucks over to commie central the other day to lure new members into the youth wing and bribe the older ones to stay on those rickety knees long enough to make sure Mitt Romney’s yacht is melted down and redistributed as solar panels.

We had a good turnout. All the teachers who showed up are busy inside headquarters decorating it like a second grade classroom for presidents’ day. I had to remind them there was food outdoors, and even then, they persisted in getting the place “well bunted up”.

My wife photographed me with the ever lovely Carolyn Taylor, and inside baseball jokes were exchanged. Our spymasters have promised us Romney’s complete collection of “I AM the 1%!” platinum tie tacks and cufflinks, but to tell you the truth, I’m still waiting on the John McCain “Vegas Slicker Shot Glasses” they promised us last time.