Dickie, George and Donald in a Hard Day's Night

Dickie, George and Donald in a Hard Day's Night

Watching the McCain campaign unveil its “Obama is definitely more popular than Jesus Christ, therefore John McCain is Jesus Christ” series of ads, I was reminded of how the Beatles tried to save America from its lard-slurping, cousin-fucking subset of snake handling Dixie rubes. After John Lennon made his comments describing how he himself was perplexed at the Beatles’ popularity, the tobacco chewers slithered out of their caves and began hawking up gobbets of stuff onto the streets and burning records to show their displeasure.

Someone asked John later what he thought of the whole mess, and he said something along the lines of “Before we came to the states, these people had no idea of fashion. The women looked like 1940’s horses and the men had stuff on their teeth.”*

It just hit me last night. The battle for the soul of America is between the Beatles (Barack) and some itinerant scam artist trying to snake a bunch of old ladies’ social security checks while he amuses snuff drooling bobos with heaps of burning vinyl (McCain). I know which side history proved the coolest, and know which side I hope winds up in a firey hell of their own imagining, complete with primitive farm implements up the ass, and Boschlike creatures feeding on the tarry residue of their brains.

I’m just that way, is all I can tell you.

*Sorry, I looked for the full quote and couldn’t find it.